I was just reading about the Winter weather here in a book some fool wrote about living in Uruguay. I was particularly struck by this quote:
The warm days go up to the mid 70s, but now the cold nights can go down to around 40, or even lower on occasion.
The fool was me, and boy, was I wrong!
This year the warmest days are bare nudging the 60s (15C+) and the nights have been known to go below 32F (0C). In fact, Sunday night it was reported to have hit 20F (-6C). It was 28F (-2C) when I checked at 9AM Monday morning. Some of our staff told me about slipping on the frost—they thought it was sand on the grass.
The fact is that Uruguay has had one of the worst winters on record. As far as I can determine, the low this past Sunday night was the lowest ever recorded here.
It has to be somebody’s fault!
After careful investigation—mostly conducted while tasting various vintages of fine Uruguayan Tannat—so of course the results must be excellent. The list of probable offenders includes:
• George W. Bush—it is his fault because he changed the usual path of the jet stream when he visited (invaded?) Uruguay with 25 jumbo airliners full of troops.
• Argentina—it is their fault because their old fashioned paper pulp plants have pumped so much pollution into the air and water that it has caused a climate shift.
• Piqueteros—it is their fault because they have blockaded the warm weather from crossing the Rio Uruguay.
The Copperhead has an alternative theory: he says that I am so large that I create my own gravity and that gravity has pulled the hole in the Ozone Layer out of whack—so I am responsible…
Heck with all those theories! It’s the Copperhead’s fault.
How do I know? Well, as all us true Southrons know, if you befriend a yankee and take him South with you, he brings the dadgum cold weather with him, a la Joe Btfsplk of L’il Abner fame.
Dave, I don’t even have to be there - I can see in my “mind’s eye” that nasty black cloud following the Copperhead around, even to the formerly verdant ROU. Send the boy back to “el Norte” and all your climatological troubles will be over.
Left by Sandlapper on August 3rd, 2007
Any theory that blames it all on Bush is fine with me.
Left by syd on August 6th, 2007
Sheesh.. I’m glad we chose this week to go to Toronto. No cold here.
Left by Fish on August 7th, 2007
Hello,
This is my first visit to the site after reading the EL PAIS article.
Good luck!
Left by Javier on August 8th, 2007